helena fairfax, freelance editor, yorkshire

Helena Fairfax

Author Sgt Stan Hampton on what friends are for…

Author Stan Hampton, Sr, has become a regular contributor to my blog, and ours is one of those unlikely friendships that could only spring up through the world of the internet.  I’m a romance author, full-blooded Irish (well, maybe some French in there, too), I live in a small, peaceful town on the edge of the moors in northern England, love knitting and training my dog, and live about as far from conflict as you could get.

Stan Hampton, Sr. is a full-blood Choctaw of the Choctaw Nation of Oklahoma, living in Las Vegas, Nevada.  He retired from the Army National Guard with the rank of Sergeant First Class, and previously served in the active duty Army (1974-1985), the Army Individual Ready Reserve (1985-1995) (mobilised for the Persian Gulf War), and enlisted in the Army National Guard in October 2004, after which he was mobilised for Federal active duty for almost three years. Stan is a veteran of Operations Noble Eagle (2004-2006) and Iraqi Freedom (2006-2007). His hobbies and studies include painting, photography and anthropology.   As of December 2011, Stan officially became a homeless Iraq War veteran.

With an unlikely acquaintance such as ours, it’s apt that Stan has come along today to talk about the nature of friendship, and what it means to him.

That’s What Friends Are For

stan hampton, helena fairfax“Blood is thicker than water,” so says an old saying.

Yeah, right.  As we all know, that is not always the case.

Sometimes when families will hurt you, abuse you and use you, the only people you can turn to, and who will always be there, are friends.

I am not referring to “fair weather friends” who will be there as long as it is convenient for them and you do not inconvenience them. I am referring to true friends who will be there day or night, whether you need to talk with someone or you need help. Your true friends will not always say “yes” nor will they always be on your side—most of all, your friends will always be honest with you. They will tell you when you are wrong and they will offer advice or help even if it is not exactly what you are looking for.

At the same time, you, as a friend, will not use or abuse those close to you. They deserve better. You will listen when they are sad or depressed, you may call just to say “Hi,” and you will be honest with them when their actions are hurting themselves or others. After all, is it not important to treat others the way you want to be treated?

In today’s world, “friend” is another one of many overused words. People say they have dozens or hundreds of friends, even though such friends are nothing more than a social or business acquaintance.

I tend to be a very reserved person; I am not a social person. There are very few people that I go to lunch or dinner with, or meet for a beer. It is just the way I am. Yet, I know that if I need to talk with someone or I need help, there will be many people there for me, just as I will be there for them.

Why? In my particular case, it is because I served in the Army National Guard; each state has its own Guard. Though there might be many units, the number of serving personnel is small. Word gets around as to who is a good person, a good Soldier, and who is reliable. Perhaps I have established such a reputation among the units I served in and the people I served with. If so, then I am grateful and humbled that people may think of me that way.

So, we come back to the idea of friends. Remember, friends are special. In this self-centered world of ours, if we can count the number of true friends on one or two hands, then we are fortunate.

Many years ago there was a very popular song: That’s What Friends Are For was written by Burt Bacharach, and sung by Dionne Warwick. There are numerous versions all over the Internet, but try this one.

While you listen to this song, think of your true friends, and consider if you are a true friend to others. Take a moment out of your busy schedule and call someone just to say, “Hi.”

*

stan hampton, helena fairfax, the sentinelsStan Hampton’s short story  The Sentinels was released by Musa Publishing on December 2011.

BLURB: December, 1941, and fresh Siberian troops from the Soviet Far East have launched savage counter-attacks against the German invaders. The Eastern Front is torn open with German units driven back, overwhelmed, or isolated. An exhausted Waffen SS infantry platoon outside of Moscow needs to know what the Siberians, hidden in a dark forest before them, are up to. A small patrol is sent into the snowy, otherworldly forest…

EXCERPT: A little more than a dozen snow encrusted German soldiers, remnants of a once strong motorized infantry platoon, grimly surveyed their surroundings. The frozen winter sun cast a feeble light across their outpost on a small rise overlooking a snowy road that bordered the forest before Moscow. Above them gray clouds painted with broad pastel strokes of reds, yellows, and purples drifted across the twilight sky.

“The sun’s going down,” Josef Frank said to no one in particular as he adjusted his leather “Y” straps on which to attach his field gear. He carefully checked his 9mm MP 38 submachine gun. In the savage cold their weapons and ammunition were scraped clean of lubricating oils because the oils froze and jammed the weapons. Even then, successful operation was no guarantee. His weapon sometimes fired only one to two rounds at a time. Then he checked the leather magazine pouches fastened to his belt—three magazines, thirty rounds per magazine, ninety rounds, and one “potato masher” stick grenade tucked in his belt. That was all he had left to face the fresh Siberian troops lurking somewhere within the dark forest before them—the last barrier that hid the suburbs of Moscow.

He glanced at the gaunt men wrapped in all manner of clothing to protect themselves against the painful cold. In that snowy otherwordly environment, it was sometimes hard to remember that he was an SS-Unterscharführer, a sergeant and a squad leader, in a much decimated Waffen SS motorized infantry battalion. All that was left of his platoon was gathered on the rise—an MG-34 gunner and his assistant, a trio of riflemen, a light mortar manned by two soldiers, and a pair of soldiers with a Panzerbusche 39 anti-tank rifle. Plus, he and his squad of three surviving soldiers who would soon creep into the forest to see what the Siberians were doing.

Their ground was no more than twenty feet higher than the surrounding terrain, and though it gave them a good overview, they were also sitting ducks. Low moans and an occasional cry came from among the scores of dirty white forms sprawled on the snowy slopes of their small rise of land. The shapeless forms trailed from the shadowed edges of the vast forest…

The Sentinels is available from Musa Publishing

*

Thanks for your thought-provoking post, Stan, as ever.  And I loved the atmospheric excerpt from your story.

What does friendship mean to you? Does Stan’s post resonate with you?  If you have any questions or comments at all, please let us know.  We’d love to hear from you!

21 responses to “Author Sgt Stan Hampton on what friends are for…”

  1. rosgemmell Avatar

    A very thoughtful post, Stan. There’s a lovely quote by Anais Nin: ‘Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.’

    Like

    1. Helena Fairfax Avatar

      What a beautiful quote, Ros. I’ve never heard it before. Thanks very much for your lovely comment

      Like

    2. Stan Avatar
      Stan

      Rosgemmell,

      Thank you. And I like the quote. Anais Nin is one of my favorite writers. Thanks for visiting, and have a great week!

      Stan

      Like

  2. margaretmendel Avatar
    margaretmendel

    When friendships work they are simple and comforting. It seems like you have a system of friends that will never run out!! I wish you great success with SENTINELS!

    Like

    1. Helena Fairfax Avatar

      That’s so true about friendships, Margaret! And Stan is blessed with his band of friends. Thanks for coming by with your good wishes

      Like

    2. Stan Avatar
      Stan

      Margaret,

      Very true. And yes, I am fortunate in the number of friends that I know I can turn to if I have to. Thanks for visiting, and have a great week!

      Like

  3. gpcox Avatar

    Excellent article and excerpt – please thank Sgt. Hampton for me for his service.

    Like

    1. Helena Fairfax Avatar

      Thank you so much for coming by and for taking the time to comment. I will certainly pass on your thanks.

      Like

    2. Stan Avatar
      Stan

      Gpcox,

      Thank you much. I appreciate it. And it was my privilege and honor to serve.

      Stan

      Like

  4. HFBrainerd Avatar

    Wonderful post, intriguing excerpt. Though Internet “friends” aren’t quite like those in real life, isn’t it amazing that we’re able to connect with people all over the world? Sometimes I sit here in NY, at my laptop, chatting with someone in Australia or the UK, and feel like I’m on Star Trek. :)

    Like

    1. Helena Fairfax Avatar

      Hi Heather, yes, it is amazing, and I know people talk about the dangers of the internet, but I’ve found it to be a real force for good, and have found genuine support from “internet friends” at times of stress. May the force be with the internet!

      Like

    2. Stan Avatar
      Stan

      HF,

      Thanks. Yes, Internet friends aren’t quite the same as real-life friends, but many times a closeness, even friendship, can develop. Like anything else, that comes with time. And yes, I am fascinated that I can communicate with people in South America and Europe, and someday maybe further afield. Have a great week!

      Stan

      Like

  5. Loren Avatar

    Thank you for this beautiful post. It made me stop for a moment and just appreciate the special friends in my life.
    I too have always valued quality over quantity in regards to friendships, and in the long run, that has enriched my life with relationships that have stood the tests of time, daily life demands, and many moves.

    Thank you for your service, and good luck with all your publications.

    Like

    1. Helena Fairfax Avatar

      Hi Loren, you’re so right. As I get older, my pool of friends has grown smaller, but my friends are real friends, and not just people I socialise with. It was a thought–provoking post from Stan, and made me think about giving my friends a call to say hi! Thanks for your great comment!

      Like

    2. Stan Avatar
      Stan

      Loren,

      You’re welcome. Serving in the military has been my privilege and honor. Than you for your comments, and for visiting.

      Stan

      Like

      1. Stan Avatar
        Stan

        Ahem. “Thank you…”

        I really should take more care in proof reading what I write.

        Like

  6. marsharwest Avatar
    marsharwest

    Helena, thanks for having Stan and his wonderful post. Good reminder to us all to say thanks to those folks who stand by us through thick and thin. I don’t think you can ever have too many friends, but you absolutely have that one or two or will walk over fire for you.
    I confess to being surprised by the depth of friendship I feel for many of you I’ve only met on the internet. I remember when a critique partner said many years ago now that she had gotten on Facebook, how much she loved it, and when would I get on. I made one of those stupid statements that sometimes cross my lips. “Never,” I said. “That’s just creepy and not safe.”
    Of course I’ve eaten my words many times over. Unsafe? Maybe so, but the connections we make are real. To be able to sit in my study and send this out to people all over the world who may read this–Wow! It’s like science fiction only better.
    Thanks so much for your service, Stan, and for sharing your insites with the rest of us. Continued success with your writing. I’ll FB and Tweet, Helena.

    Like

    1. Helena Fairfax Avatar

      Thanks for your wonderful comment, Marsha. I’ve made friends and kept in contact with close family all over the world through the power of FB and email. You’re right, the connections we make in cyber space are real. Thanks so much for taking the time to comment!

      Like

    2. Stan Avatar
      Stan

      Marsha,

      I know what you mean. Since I’ve gone active on Facebook due to my writing (I created the account years before as part of a college class), I’m surprised at the depth of communication with others that sometimes occurs. And, serving in the military has been my privilege and honor. Thank you for your kind comments.

      Stan

      Like

  7. Stan Avatar
    Stan

    Helena,

    And again, thank you for this opportunity by having me visit your blog!

    Stan

    Like

    1. Helena Fairfax Avatar

      It’s been a pleasure, Stan! Hope to see you here again soon! :)

      Like

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